23 Years later - The Lessons I've Learned
Over the past 23 years of my life, I've been very distracted. I've been distracted with learning to make money, meet women, and be successful in various areas of life. I've learned a lot.
I've learned that 99% of what society pushes on you is bullshit. Short and simple, here is what I've learned...
Money isn't hard to obtain. It's hard as hell to manage. You unconsciously and consciously want to keep up with your social circle by having new gadgets and products. You are doomed psychologically by advertisements and brand pressures that have been instilled since your birth. Most of us live paycheck to paycheck. I was the same way until the spring of 2011. I now set aside 11% each time I pay myself and use that money specifically to make more money (aka I invest it).
I have also separated my bank accounts neatly based on my needs. I have an account for each: emergency, car fund, travel fund, investments, and happiness. The happiness account is only used on other people.
I have found if you just split up each paycheck like you are running your own business, then you will be successful with money. Excel helps.
Women are easy to meet. Relationships are a different story. Don't be fooled by society into thinking you have to be something special. I have ADHD, and my thoughts run around like a madman. I also wouldn't consider myself to be attractive. I run a business that means shit when it comes to girls. I could work at a gas station and still do just as well.
Don't be the tool with the suit on.
She doesn't want roses, she wants your attention.
Lead, because if you don't, she'll find someone who will.
When she freaks out, kill her with love.
Oh, and just chill out. Women are not worth it to get mad about, ever.
Are they even worth it? I ask myself this a lot. When you first meet someone, it's always the best, it's scientific. When you kiss or have sex for the first time with a girl you just meet, your brain releases a chemical called dopamine, and you become addicted to how good it feels. This may be why you find yourself on her social media randomly.
For any relationship to last, it has to move beyond that into mature love. If you aren't truly compatible with the girl, it will never work out, so stop trying to make it. Your brain will fool you into thinking about all the lovey-dovey shit society has pushed on your ass throughout your whole life. None of that matters. True love is the exact opposite of what you see in the movies.
Extremely Important: Your Purpose in Life Comes BEFORE your Woman. Always.
I see guys start dating, and they turn into complete bitches. I know because i have done it. Your purpose is #1, if you try to find that in your woman, you are doomed to hell.
If I am not monitoring my health, I get fat quickly. I also feel like shit.
Turns out it's easy to be healthy. You work out and eat right every day. You wouldn't brush your teeth every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday - so why the fuck do you do that with working out and eating right?
Don't have time? Tough shit, no one does. The last place i want to be is in the gym surrounded by juicers every day.
Get healthy for YOU, not other people.
Look up a paleo diet. It's the only kind of diet you should ever do.
Being a business owner is tough. Every day is a new battle, and sometimes you question if it's worth it. The best (and most raw/true) business book I have ever read is Entreleadership by Dave Ramsey. I have 100's of highlight marks in that and refer to it on a monthly basis.
It's about people, not about you. It's about your customers and employees.
You aren't the boss. The customer is. Don't forget that.
Not every customer is a good customer.
Avoid business theory books by people who have never done it.
Learn from your mistakes and consult with other business owners.
Eckhart Tolle. Be Present. God is in everything and everybody. Avoid church. Avoid groups of people who sell you shit.