Step #1 – Admitting You Might Have A Problem
I’ve never slept well.
I always figured it was in my genetics.
Growing up, my mom would wake up in the middle of the night to do something productive around the house. I am not much different. I would get up and start working. Or work late and get up early. Heck, even if I partied all night, I would still wake up early. I never paid attention to sleep and whether it affected me in any way.
That all came to a halt in 2018.
I was out with some friends in Austin. At dinner one of them asked me if I was getting enough sleep. I snapped back, “of course, I am.” But even after a night of drinks and fun, the next morning I couldn’t forget what my friend had said. It echoed in my mind. Was I looking that bad these days?
It’s not the first time someone commented on how tired I looked. My dad has told me similar things throughout the years. My excuse was that I was always “overworked” and “busy.”
My internal dialog always re-affirmed the tiredness… “this is just part of the life I chose.”
But that was bullshit. I knew plenty of other people with businesses and stress just like me, but they weren’t walking around looking tired. Why am I like this?
With a respected friends voice ringing in my head, I set out on a goal to fix my sleep. It’s amazing what a little peer pressure can cause someone to do.
Step #2 – Track Your Sleep – Do You Even Have a Problem?
I’m a data guy at heart. I love seeing trends and looking at the details. This attitude transferred over into my new little sleep project.
I quickly spent $300 on an Oura Ring – a state of the art ring that tracks your sleep. The problem was that it wasn’t going to arrive for months… 5 months to be exact. Apparently, I missed the part that mentioned they still had to produce it as I was checking out.
I couldn’t afford to wait. I needed the answers now. As soon as the plane touched down back in Vegas, I immediately went to Wal-Mart and got a Garmin Vivosport bracelet. This tracker will work until I get my fancy ring, I thought.
I set it up and went to sleep. The next morning I was eager to see the results. Unfortunately, it didn’t have any results for the first night. Damn it.
It needs a day to calibrate. Should have known.
In the months that followed it was clear that my sleep was not the greatest. It wasn’t the worst either. Even though I was working with only a little bit of data (my Oura Ring was still being produced in Finland), I knew there was room for improvement.
Step #3 – Fixing Your Sleep
There are things you can do to improve your sleep that cost $0.00. That’s right — free ninety-nine. So, let’s start with these.
- Lower the damn temperature. Your body will fall asleep much quicker if you keep your temperature around 67 degrees Fahrenheit. Why it took me 29 years to realize this, I am unsure. But it works.
- Never Allow Your Phone in Your Sleeping Environment. Remember when the bedroom just used to be about those two sacred things? Me neither. The fact is your phone is the biggest threat to your sleep. Stop using it 45 minutes before sleep. By stop using it, I mean plug it in, put it down and do not look at it.
- Block Blue light On All Devices. Your circadian rhythm matters. Your phone, your laptop, tablet, and TV are fucking that all up. They are fucking it up BIG TIME. Luckily, most tech companies realize this, and they all natively have blue light blockers that will help you sleep. On Apple its called Night Shift. Microsoft calls it Night Light. Google calls it Night Mode. Have your devices aligned with when the sun comes up and when the sun goes down. You will be amazed at the result. Don’t freak out when you start feeling tired at night again – you are supposed to!
- No Caffeine After 12 PM (or whenever 10 hours before you go to sleep is). According to 23 and me, I am sensitive to caffeine. It only takes a little bit for me to be off the wall and fry my adenosine receptors. Many hidden sources of caffeine will upset you – dark chocolate, green tea, black tea, and decaf coffee. The rule applies to all of these.
- If Your Drinking Alcohol, You Won’t Sleep Well. I understand that you are going to have special events and nights where you will be drinking. Is there a way to sleep well after a night of drinking? No. I can only recommend a couple of things – limit the number of drinks and do not eat until the next day. I haven’t been able to do these things, so I don’t expect you to either. Both alcohol and marijuana will help you fall asleep but will destroy the quality of your sleep. I wish it were not true, but it is.
- Avoid Huge Meals Before Bed. Most of us eat huge meals after a night of drinking. This ties in with the previous point. Simply put if you are drinking alcohol and eating a pizza, you are going to sleep like shit.
- Exercise. This one is cliche, but it is still true. The body is made to move and be on the hunt. Go for a short run, long walk and lift some weights. If you are physically tired at the end of the day, you will fall drift off into dreamland much easier.
Ok, those are your free options. If those don’t work than you can try these powerhouse options, they will cost money.
- Take CBD Sublingually (under the tongue) Before Bed. While the THC in marijuana hurts the quality of your sleep, CBD helps it. It enhances your sleep cycles. Most importantly, a high dose will help you fall asleep easier. If you are a regular night-time weed smoker than it probably won’t help you as much. A high dose of CBD might make you feel groggy in the morning, which is why I usually only take it on the weekends.
- Magtech Magnesium + Gaba Brain Food. Most of us are deficient in magnesium. This really messes up our sleep. Taking a supplement like this helps some people more than others. It depends on how deficient you are. I combine Magtech with Gaba Brain Food. It pretty much knocks me out. These two supplements are both can be found at Natural Stacks.
- Sleep Phones With White Noise. I have a new found love for white noise. It works. You can buy a white noise machine on Amazon that has a headphone jack. Connect the sleep phones and boom; you won’t disturb anyone.
- Turn On Your Fan (or buy one). If you have a ceiling fan, try turning it on the highest setting. A fan seems to help a lot of people fall asleep, including me. Of course, if you don’t have a fan, you can always resort to the last bullet point or buy one.
- A New Bed. I dropped $1500 on a bed last year. Saatva Luxury Mattress – The firm option. Before that, I was sleeping on a Casper mattress. What people want to ignore about foam mattresses is that they get hot. I don’t care what kind of cooling foam bullshit is in the marketing…. doesn’t work. If you read the above, you will understand that temperature matters. If you want to fall asleep and stay asleep, then it must be cool. So while the first few weeks you may be telling your friends how comfortable your mattress is, any foam mattress will very likely hurt your sleep in the long run.
- Smart Lights for Hacking Circadian Rhythm. I bought this Phillips Hue system that auto dims the lights at sundown and turns them on in the morning with the sunrise. You can set them to whatever times you want to fit your sleep schedule. I do not even use an alarm to wake up; the lights wake me up. When they begin to dim in the evening, they also make me tired and get me in the sleeping mode.
Sleep Shouldn’t Cause Anxiety
Listen, I got anxious about my sleep, so hopefully, you do not have to. If you think you are not getting good sleep than verify this by getting a good sleep tracker. There are tons of sleep trackers now. I finally received my Oura Ring a few months ago and have since been using it religiously. It works.
Start with the stuff that doesn’t cost any money above. More than 90% of you will fix your sleep without spending a dime. I have a small project I started called Sleepline. I don’t know where it will go, but I do know I plan on educating millions of people on sleep and helping them get quality shut-eye as well.
Disclaimer: I am not a doctor and you should check with him/her before trying any supplements. I am merely a supplement fanboy looking for an edge anywhere I can get it in life. When I find cool stuff, I like to tell people about it 🙂
First off I must just tell you that this stuff makes me feel absolutely amazing. I have been taking this every day for the last 5 days. Originally, I was just going to take it after a cheat day in an effort to put myself back into ketosis, but I decided that it made me feel so good that I would do a longer run and post my experience here.
What is Kegenix?
Kegenix is a top of the line exogenous ketone supplement using a formula developed by Dr. Dominic D’Agostino (http://www.ketonutrition.org) and other PhD’s at the University of South Florida. Dom is not associated with the company Kegenix, but they benefit from his research. Dom recently said on the Tim Ferris podcast that he had nothing but good experiences while taking Kegenix (Listen here – 1:29:40: http://fourhourworkweek.com/2016/07/06/dom-dagostino-part-2/).
Is this the same as putting myself into Ketosis?
Although Kegenix and most other exogenous ketone supplements will put you into ketosis, it is not the same as your body producing ketones and there is so far no research proving that it will help you lose weight.
If you are doing a low-carb, keto style diet this supplement will give you important micro nutrients. Those micros are Potassium, Sodium and Magnesium. Your body needs these 3 nutrients much more when you are in ketosis. Learn more about keto flu here.
Can I use Kegenix after cheat days?
This is how I first started using Kegenix and how I will continue to use it after this 5 day trial. Although I do not have evidence, I do believe it speeds up the time it would normally take my body to get back into ketosis and producing its own ketones. This is pending of your diet of course. For example, after a carb binger on a Friday / Saturday, the next day i would feel intense cravings. With Kegenix the cravings do not exist. It is kind of an odd experience because your mind is thinking “hey, shouldn’t we be hungry?”. There is no urge for me. Again, this is likely case by case. I am very used to eating a Keto diet.
Can I Take this and Eat Whatever I Want?
Although Kegenix sort-of advertises this, I don’t believe you should do it. It just depends where you are at with your weight goals and how you plan to use Kegenix. If you are using this to lose weight, I would follow a strict ketogenic diet along with it.
If you already have a great metabolism and are using this more as a pre-workout or cognitive booster than you can probably be a little bit more lenient with your diet. It is really a case by case basis.
Kegenix & Cognitive Excellence
One of the most important takeaways from my 5 day experience with Kegenix was just how powerful the cognitive effect is. Basically, it makes your brain feel great. I was a little skeptical at first because I saw one of the ingredients was green tea extract but nowhere did it disclaim how much caffeine was in the supplement. What if they put a bunch of caffeine in this and that is why it makes me feel good?
After contacting Kegenix I found out that the caffeine content from the green tea extract was a mere 75mg. I should have realized the energy I was feeling wasn’t from caffeine because there was no crash. Kegenix consistently produces about 6-8 hours of clean energy. There is a lot of research on how good ketones benefit your brain. I’ll put some resources below.
One of the downsides to this supplement is how expensive it is. As of now you can buy Kegenix online for $147. In time I believe the price of all ketone supplements will go down and be widely accessible.
Great Resources on Ketosis / Exogenous Ketones
If you are reading this, you already know what you need to do and you already know exactly how to do it. You are simply here trying to be more organized, but the answer is not organization.
The real answer to overcoming information overload is to gain clarity and take small actions over time. I’ll go over this in detail below, but first…
Most people have no idea why the fuck they are doing what they are doing. Plenty of what they are doing is a form of escapism or mental masturbation. In the 21st century it is nearly impossible to sit with our own thoughts. We might have a fucking panic attack or die if we have to listen to that voice inside our very complex brain.
So what do we do? We watch YouTube videos. We are on Snapchat, Vine, Pinterest, (fill in your mental fuck-toy here). We look for someone or some company to give our hard earned money to without ever considering that they might not fucking deserve it. We are swarmed with people trying to sell us online courses that promise to get us ahead. We download that new to-do list app, this will fix all of our problems!
There is no simplicity anymore, is there? Our brains were not made for all the stimulation we have instant access to.
What is Information Overload?
Every 60 seconds 72+ Hours of YouTube video is uploaded, millions of words published and 2.4 million queries are typed into Google. This is really just the tip of the iceberg because it is not slowing down. I could make facts like this the centerpiece of this entire blog, but this would get us know where.
With all this information, how are we supposed to filter through it to find actionable takeaways and get things done?
It is easier than you think, but first you need to prepare with the following 2 actions:
Turn off your phone while you’re trying to get a specific thing done
Your phone is not a productivity tool and it is laced with endless loops of notifications that send dopamine hits to your brain. It might even make you feel like you are getting something done. After all, billions of dollars are spent making sure you are addicted to using your phone and the apps within it. There is a time for your phone but it is not when you are trying to get things done.
Eliminate All Distractions
If you are trying to eat healthier or stop drinking alcohol one of the first pieces of advice is to change your environment. They tell you to throw out all junk food and alcohol you have in your house. Some of the most distracting things are not food or gadgets, they are people.
You cannot throw away people, but you can set boundaries.
What distractions are eating at you? Here are some common ones distractions and solutions.
This includes the people closest to you. People like your wife, parents, employees, etc.
Solution: Turn off your phone and let people know you will only be able to talk at certain times and when you are done with what needs to be done. Be sure to say this in a nice way so it is not taken wrong. If you do not tell people your dilemma soon, you will eventually blow up on them and that never feels good for anyone involved.
Your Phone Notifications Going Off
There is so much shit on our smart phone. It seems we cannot escape it. Let’s see.. email, facebook, snapchat, Instagram, yelp, text messages, etc.. All these are competing for your attention and are made to be addicting (read Hooked) and you are somehow supposed to get things done. Yea, right.
Solution: I put my phone on airplane mode or turn it off when I am doing anything important, including spending time with friends and family. With some apps I am extremely annoyed by, I kill the notifications completely so I can open them at my convenience.
If you are in an office environment, you know how fucking horrible this can be. You are ZONED IN, getting stuff done and then you have to go-to a meeting. Most of the time, it’s a complete waste of time.
Solution: Tell your manager that you have some very important work to get done that will grow the company and you cannot be bothered with meeting. If you say this nicely, your boss will understand.
Social Media Websites
If you’re like most of us you constantly open a new tab with your favorite website, whether it is social or news based. Sure, it’s nice to take a break every so often but this can take you out of the zone and derail your entire day.
Solution: Focus on the task at hand by removing all tabs or programs that are not essential to what you are doing. You can also try a tool like one tab (https://www.one-tab.com) which consolidate all those distracting tabs.
You know what it is and how bad it is fucking you over. So much information is sent to us on a day to day basis, pulling us everywhere except where we need to go.
Solution: Close it. SHUT IT DOWN!!
People Walking All Over Your Time
Have you ever been completely focused on something, making massive progress and then someone just walks in and wants to “talk” or “bullshit”.
Solution: Don’t allow it. All it will take is setting a boundary one time and you will never have to worry about this again.
How to Kill Information Overload
Step #1: Gain Clarity on Your End Goal
The reason a lot of people feel trapped by the information that is all around them is because they have no clarity on what they are trying to accomplish. I know you are probably sitting there and saying, “I know what I want!!”. Do you really?
If you really know what you want than you are likely using information as a form of escapism from taking action, which we will talk about below. Before that, you should really check your goals at the door and see if they are your goals or the goals of someone else. Learn more on how to set goals here.
Step #2: Take Small Actions Over Time
Most people get stuck on the information treadmill, meaning they feel like they are making progress but they actually are not moving anywhere at all. Taking action can be hard and your brain will try to avoid it at all cost.
Why take small actions? Because overcoming information overload is all about momentum through action. Here’s an example:
Goal: Start a Personal Training Website To Promote Yourself
Small Action 1: Buy the domain name “MikesFitnessTrainingSite.com”
Small Action 2: Google search “best website building platform”
Small Action 3: Sign up for website builder
Small Action 4: Add content and ask friends for testimonials
Small Action 5: Submit your site locally to google, yelp and other small business portals
Small Action 6: Ask your same friends to review you on yelp and google.
Small Action 7: Promote, promote, promote and tell people about it.
You get the idea. START and keep going. You will hit obstacles, as with all things. You don’t need to go back to school to solve them, turn to any search engine to look for people who had this problem before you. With proper action and a clear goal, you can do anything.
Every year that goes by it seems like more and more bullshit is working against our body’s natural circadian rhythm. It is not just that we are busier or have more going on, but also that we have screens in our living rooms, on our laps, in our hands and now on our fucking wrists. We can not escape an endless stream of information that are brains have been (sort of) trained to keep checking for notifications. With each new notification we get a new dopamine spike. Not long after it becomes an addiction. A year or so ago, after reading the book Hooked & the Power of Habit, i realized how bad these little addictions were affecting my sleep. I turned to Dr. Google to help me find an answer.
There is the obvious stuff: turn off the TV, keep the phone outside the bedroom , get blackout shades.
This obvious stuff won’t do anything about your brain, which is unconsciously craving another dopamine spike while you lay there and get side tracked counting sheep to think about how fucked up it is that you forgot to brush your teeth. There are two things that have helped me greatly in the sleep department.
Specifically, i use MagTech about an hour before i go to bed. MagTech accurately dubs itself as ” Premium Blend of The 3 Most Powerful Forms of Magnesium”. These forms of Magnesium include Magnesium L-threonate (Magtein), Magnesium Taurate, Magnesium Glycinate.
Simply put, the stuff is absolutely amazing. If you think you are a tough guy or gal and don’t need magnesium, just listen to Dr. Liu who helped develop MagTein (Magnesium L-threonate):
Yogi Soothing Caramel Bedtime Tea
I discovered Yogi Soothing Caramel Bedtime Tea through Tim Ferris. After half of a cup, you feel slap happy. The effect is somewhat funny. You begin to talk slow and then crawl to your bed. Taking this with MagTech basically guarantees me a good nights sleep. The best part? I do not feel drowsy the next morning or have any trouble whatsoever getting up.
Until next time!
I, like many in their early 20s, am faced with this giant problem: Mental Fatigue. It could be my own fault for focusing on a million things at once or maybe it is simply a sign of the times. Either way, I’ve been searching for solutions. I’ve been listening to people like Dave Asprey, who is a genius when it comes to health. I’ve been participating in many online forums, reading books on focus and procrastination. I own a company, you would think with all this freedom I would be the ultimate focused person.
That is, until I started taking CILTEP + Smart Caffeine a month ago. Since then my life has drastically improved in ways that I must share.
Before I get into how CILTEP helped me focus and be an overall better human being, let me tell you – this isn’t my first time trying to solve brain fog. I’ve tried Alpha Brain, Modafinil and even made my own stack of supplements (with alpha GPC, Vinpocetine, Huperzine A and Piracetam). Afterall, everyone in silicon valley is taking something to give them an edge, why not me? Obviously with each one I felt a little something and in Modafinils case it worked but gave me a massive headache.
I don’t like headaches and i’m guessing you don’t either. When I stumbled upon CILTEP, I was initially thinking that it wasn’t going to work that great. I was very wrong – It works the best out of any brain supplement I’ve tried. It’s just the right amount of kick to make me a PRODUCTIVE BEAST!
My Relationships Improved
Most of us take supplements like this just to study better or be more productive. I took it to gain an edge at work, which i’ll talk about below, but it has also had a profound effect on my relationships. Have you ever felt like when you are with someone that you are not completely present with them? Like you are listening, but your not actually listening? With CILTEP this just doesn’t happen. Whether it’s my business partner or my girlfriend, they have have my FULL attention. Not only do they have my full presence, but when it comes time for me to talk I say things that are absolutely effortless to say – there is no thinking – elegant words just roll off my tongue. It’s a pretty good feeling for someone who is usually socially awkward!
I’m WAY More Productive
I work longer hours, not because I have to, but because I like to. CILTEP has given me this feeling of being in the zone that I can only compare to complete ecstasy. At the end of the day when I am done with work, i feel so satisfied with myself because now the amount of work I get done in 8 or 9 hours, is what i would have gotten done in two weeks pre-CILTEP days! The only way to understand what I am talking about is to try actually TRY IT. You will be doing yourself a massive favor.
The last few weeks everyone in my life has heard me talk on and on about CILTEP and how amazing it is. I can not shut up about it and soon, I may even start distributing it. Everyone should feel like this! Also, The company Natural Stacks has proven to be amazing. I 100% believe that they care about quality and what they are putting out there. I also started taking the new magnesium supplement they offer with great effects.
Non Identical Twins…
Looked at the ultrasound this morning. Name ideas? Names? Nope already got em…
It was scorching fucking hot in Vegas out in front of our office when me and my business partner Adam decided… wow STbands is not giving our customers the best experience. Two different groups coming to one confused site. We decided enough is enough. The site had to be split in two. Before we even knew the names, we new that one site needed to focus on selling custom sweatbands, custom silicone wristbands and other custom promotional products, swag and giveaways. The other site needed to cater to people looking for sweat bands and other unique sports accessories. This was the make up of our old STbands site.
These two sites mark a milestone for my company. Because the two websites are only half the story. We made a substantial investment in a new back-end that will allow our customers / team to have an even better experience.
Also in other SerTop news, we had our busiest month ever last month. As a result, we decided this month to take our whole team to Disneyland – each person gets to bring someone else and everything including the hotel, transportation and meals is paid for by us. We are extremely proud of how hard our team has worked.
I’ll let you know when I really have kids. Which will be soon.
I came across this video a few days ago:
“What i’m trying to say is you got to cut a little piece of yourself off, no matter how much it hurts, in order to grow…in order to move on.”
This is solid and made me think about some things. The egoic self attaches itself to people, ideas, habits, etc and it doesn’t want to let them go. What this ultimately means is that if you would like to grow in any area of your life, you need to get good at saying NO to things that are currently holding you back. NO to shit food, NO to manipulative ex lovers, NO to things that waste your time, NO to fill in the blank.
Of course you also need to know the things to say yes to as well or you will be misguided. Be hungry to learn, to want more out of yourself.
I’ve spent my whole life killing parts of myself…
A few months ago, I stopped drinking completely. I did it because i realized it was getting in the way of my focus and I was using it as a crutch to be more at ease socially. I had to kill the part of my mind that wanted to drink in order to grow and not use it as a crutch anymore. It worked and because of the sacrifice I am now better off.
When it comes to relationships it is especially important to take note of negative manipulation early and cut it off completely. Kill the part of yourself that feels sorry for someone else’s indecision. Make the decision to move in a better direction.
When it comes to business, take a good look at what is going on. Realize that in order to grow more you need to kill certain aspects and just flat our say no. A business that try’s to do it ALL becomes the fat kid on the block that eats fast foot and dies young. Slash and grow. Keep an eye on trends RELEVANT TO YOUR COMPANY (NOT YOUR COMPETITORS)
Be honest with yourself, what things do you need to KILL in yourself to grow?
Three years ago I took a tour through Zappos HQ in Henderson, Nevada. When I walked in they had a massive book shelf. On the shelf were numerous books on focus, business and other topics. One book, I can’t remember the name, was on the topic of happiness and I was extremely interested. Over the last 3 years I have dived deep into the concept of happiness and what makes one happy.
How I Stay Happy & How You Can Too…
Below are 5 ways I continuously stay happy, but first I want to mention something that is foundational and that is you need a ecosystem of positivity around you. What do I mean by this? Well, what I mean is that you have so many things that you are doing for your well being that if you take one of those element out it won’t ruin you. You aren’t dependent on anything or any one thing for your happiness. Most people find themselves latching on to one thing, like a girlfriend and when shit hits the fan they can not recover as fast because their ecosystem is so dependent on that one person. Now, on to the 5 ways I stay happy…
Don’t Take Anything Personally
This one has been particularly hard for me over the years, but it’s a must if you want to stay happy. If a person does something that really sets you off, realize that you have a choice to focus on that or something else. Just let go, no matter how bad you think a person did you wrong. I’ve been there a million times where my mind just literally goes CRAZY on someone. I can tear people to shreds if I am not practicing this art of not taking anything personally.
Connect With Others & Have Good (happy) Friends
People always say to have a good group of friends around you, but what does that even mean? It means you can joke with them, shoot shit, have a good laugh. It also means you can have more in depth conversations about things you are going through. Sometimes your friends will be able to offer value to your situation and other times they won’t. The most important thing you’ll come to realize about good friends is that they listen. The best friends you have will humble you and bring you back down to earth when your ego gets the best of you.
Strive To Be Healthy
Everyone says this…what the hell are you suppose to take from this? Nutrition is by far the most important thing – more important than working out – for your health. Not only that but, being healthy is maybe the most important aspect of staying happy in tough times. I could literally write a book on health, instead I’ll give you a list of books I’ve read (there are also plenty of free resources on the net):
Live In The Present Moment
The true way to escape your mind, which creates most of your unhappiness, is to live fully in the present moment. There was never a time that was not now, nor will there ever be (as Eckhart Tolle says). Take a deep breath and enjoy the scenery around you. Focus on your breathing. Being present, as they call it, is the most profound life shift one can make. With all the shit crammed into your head on a daily basis, presence is your way back to the truth. The truth that all that exists is this moment. People tell you to live in the moment, but they unfortunately have ruined the saying. Now living in the moment means getting wasted, doing stupid shit and ending up feeling horrible the next day. Being present doesn’t require any special substance, you only need a pulse.
Change How You See Things
There are two sides to every thing that happens to you in this life. In any given situation you can choose to see the opportunity or the negatives. If you lose your job, now you have an opportunity to get a new and better one. Have to move back in with your parents? This will give you a better chance to connect with and learn from them. Relationship ended? Good, you’ll finally get one you deserve. See, you don’t have to latch on to the negatives. The only reason you do is because your mind is searching for and addicted to these thought patterns. You can combat this by staying present, not taking anything personally and having great friends.
On a very immature, but somewhat true for most, level – not long after most people are in a relationship they want to be single again & not long after they are single again they want to be in a relationship. The grass is always greener on the other side. This is especially true for people of high status (celebrity divorces).
The Reason For This?
There are two reasons I can think of: People have no fucking clue how to make relationships work & people generally don’t know what they want. Basically, out of scarcity most people throw themselves into relationships & out of stupidity they find themselves thrown out of them.
In some cases it serves people to be single more than in a relationship and vice versa. But instead of looking within themselves, people look to society to tell them how to feel about this subject. For example, some men are actually more productive if they are in a relationships with a variety of women instead of just one, conversely some men need just that one to be productive. This is different person to person.
There a variety of different situations like this.
Do You Know
What Who You Want?
No, really… do you know who you want? What are their traits? Ok, now get that out of your head because it doesn’t exist. You can find someone who is close, but you can never find exactly what you want because your expectations are way too high. You’ve watched one too many movies and have escaped from reality. What you need is someone who has a good head on their shoulders. Someone who can be honest with you and loves the shit out of you, but still has their own version of reality.
Making Relationships Work
I’ll tell you straight away that some relationships aren’t meant to work, the two are not compatible and love fades. Don’t force it. This usually happens if one of the two don’t know what they want. If they are confused, don’t waste time trying to win them over. Just work on being your best self and the right one will come along. Let me say that again, work on being your best self for YOU. Mastery health and your emotions, have some fun – life is short.
Assuming you both want each other and you aren’t confused, than you have a whole other issue: making it work. Even if you are single and not looking for a relationships, i recommend the book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. The reason is, it will help you understand the opposite sex much better.
Since this is a male perspective, here are some important points when you are with your woman…
Listen without offering solutions – Many relationships don’t work because men do not listen. I don’t mean you have to be a push over and do everything she says, but the least you can do is listen to everything she has to say and NOT OFFER SOLUTIONS. Women don’t want to hear solutions, they just want someone to listen to them. If they need solutions they can go to their girl friends.
Women Think In Emotions, Not Logically – Many men make the mistake of thinking women can even comprehend their intense logical ideas. The problem is a feminine woman is more concerned about feelings and emotions, not logic. Shut the fuck up with your logic and give her a kiss or talk in an emotional way. Most of the time what you feel, she feels.
A Woman’s Friends Are Extremely Important – Respect her friends and her time with them. This will pay back dividends in the future.
Love – Love the girl you are with, don’t just say it. Show it in multiple ways, every single day.
Be Decisive – Know exactly what you want and tell her about it. There is nothing a girl hates more than a guy who does not know what they want – this goes the other way around too 🙂
Masculine / Feminine Polarity is Important
This video says it perfectly…
I’m starving! Until next time…
How would you feel if you didn’t brush your teeth for a day? Well that is how i feel if I don’t work out for a day.
How in the hell do I make a correlation between working out and brushing your teeth? They are both habits. They are not a must, they are habits. You do not have to brush your teeth, you do it because you want good dental health. If your like most people who strive to be healthy and feel good, you do it more than you work out.
Your Habits & Rituals Make You
Brushing your teeth is a ritual. Looking in the mirror every day, a ritual. Putting stuff in your hair, a ritual. Sex, a ritual. These things make or break you in the long term.